The Human Curse

Loneliness.

Have you ever had that feeling when you're just looking at everyone passing by around you and you just know that even if you knew these people, they would never ever fill that gaping hole in your heart?

Have you ever been out for a drink with your best friend, whom you've always thought share so many similarities, but realize that all you share now are differences?

It's now 2012, and I'm aware of what a different person I've become. They say maturity comes with age, but for me, I say it's silence. I've learned over the years no one really wants to listen to what you have to say, not even your so called close friends and I've learned how to really be quiet and just keep things to myself.

In a way you could say that I'm cementing walls around my thoughts, not only because I think people don't want to listen, but also because I feel that there's no need for others to know what I am thinking. You could say that people will go crazy keeping things in their hearts, but you have to question, why do people want to pour out their thoughts?

Years ago I would have argued and debated with cynics that yes, there is such a thing in life as best friends, because I truly felt that there is that one single person whom you feel you truly have so many things in common, and felt the same way with you. But the plain truth is that, there isn't a person in this world who feels exactly the same way you do, no. How could two people ever feel exactly the same towards an opinion, or a person, or an experience?

Years ago, I would have argued that yes, there is such a thing as soulmates where two people, whether of the same gender or not, can have so many similarities and agree with each other on so many things, that they seem to complement each other. But I guess the truth is that people change, not because they want to, but because circumstances and experiences forced them to; and the people who you once thought was your soulmate, suddenly seem so distant and different from you.

At this point in time, you either adapt and grow the same opinions to hang on to that thin thread of similarities, or you just move on, in search for someone who would fill that absolute desire for completion. Sadly, we almost always never find that one person.


I guess in life, we should never search for a person who would complement us. Instead, we should search for ways in how to cope with loneliness, because truth is, everyone is running the same race at a different pace, and no matter how hard you try to catch up or slow down, you could never be at the same pace with another person.

Like cars on a highway, two cars could never drive on the same speed for a long period of time. Either one will be faster than the other, before either one speeds off in front with exasperation, leaving the other behind to greet the smell of burning tyres.